I just ate a cherry cordial. I was reading the little tag on it that said "cherry cordial" when it occurred to me that while the candy did have a cherry taste to it, it was not cordial. This candy was not particularly friendly. Sure, it wasn't rude or mean... but it didn't give me a heart felt "Hey John, how are you?", or a smile, or a pat on the back... nothing. Actually, I got the distinct impression that this candy really didn't care about me at all. It's not that I blame the candy for it's ambivalence. Quite the contrary, I think ambivalence is the best I could hope for from something I'm going to eat. I'm lucky I didn't get a "cherry malevolent"... But then why call it a "cordial"? Why not a "cherry ambivalent", or as the kids would say a "cherry meh"?
Stupid inaccurate candy names. Now that I think of it, this problem is HUGE! If you open a Three Musketeers, I'll bet there aren't three chocolate covered little french sword guys in there. Mars? Sure, nuts and sweet goodness, but no extraterrestrial ANYTHING. Jolly Ranchers are neither ranchers nor particularly jolly. WTF?!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Read this... FOR SCIENCE!!! (A poll)
First, let me state for the record that I love showers. Well maybe not showers so much as the way you feel when you get out of the shower and you're all clean. You really can't get that without taking a shower, so I take a lot of showers. Today, as I was taking shower number two, I started thinking. "John, I wonder... how many showers do other people take in a day? Are you obsessive when it comes to showers? Does it matter?". So in the interest of satisfying my curiosity, and to add to my growing body of evidence that girls are stinky and have cooties, do me a favor. Leave a comment (either with your name or anonymously if you're ashamed of being filthy) with how many times a day you shower.
I will start.
During the week, I usually take 3 showers a day. Because I value cleanliness.
I will start.
During the week, I usually take 3 showers a day. Because I value cleanliness.
Monday, September 15, 2008
LHC Webcam
For those of you who are interested in this cool piece of science, here's a webcam from the LHC
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Does it strike anyone else as awesome...
that we live in an age where I can sit on my fat ass, drinking a glass of wine, and see something like this?
Sometimes, for fun, I think about what I would say if I had to describe the age I live in to someone living 200 years ago. "Yeah dude, I can sit on my ass in my house and watch storms on Mars". "Yeah, well... I have a horse".
Sometimes, for fun, I think about what I would say if I had to describe the age I live in to someone living 200 years ago. "Yeah dude, I can sit on my ass in my house and watch storms on Mars". "Yeah, well... I have a horse".
I'm getting old.
I remember when I first heard Metallica. I was a lad of 15, and they had not really broken in the US. A guy from Canada I was skiing with played Ride the Lightning for me and I was blown away. I had never heard anything played with that kind of speed and aggression before and I was hooked. I was a huge Metallica fan up till the black album, when I kind of lost interest. After that, I would hear some of their newer stuff from time to time. It just got weaker and more diluted. I moved on to other music, and apparently they moved on too.... to the mall.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Obama a pedophile?
Well, seems that's what the McCain/Mrs. Jesus camp would have you believe. Classy.
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Career Planning
I believe I have found my next job. Based on my many qualifications, I will be throwing my hat in the ring to become the next king of Swaziland.
Monday, September 08, 2008
I like turtles!
Yeah, I'm a little late to the party but this kid is my new hero.
Anyway, that's all I have right now.
Sorry.
Anyway, that's all I have right now.
Sorry.
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Wednesday, September 03, 2008
Why I might begin...
...to agree with Fred Phelps and his bunch, at least when it comes to America.
This is news. Folks, we truly live in a golden age. Behold the birth of the cult of the teenage baby mama.
Abstinence only sex education! It works for Jesus, it works for America.
This is news. Folks, we truly live in a golden age. Behold the birth of the cult of the teenage baby mama.
Abstinence only sex education! It works for Jesus, it works for America.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Attacking John McCain
Kind of hard to say bad stuff about a guy who sacrificed that much for his country, and was a bad ass fighter pilot. Hell, the majority of my problem with him is his friends not necessarily him.
Knowing that this is true, the folks at somethingawful have made it much easier but creating the John McCain Honorable Attack Generator. Reload the page for a new one.
Knowing that this is true, the folks at somethingawful have made it much easier but creating the John McCain Honorable Attack Generator. Reload the page for a new one.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
A little background on my neighbors
My post the other day mentioned that I am now living next door to juggalos. I neglected to address the fact that some of you might not be familiar with these fine examples of what humans can be when they follow their dreams.
There is nothing that can truly sum up the juggalo experience like the story of young Anabell Lotus.
Read (slightly NSFW)
Listen
Learn
Cry
There is nothing that can truly sum up the juggalo experience like the story of young Anabell Lotus.
Read (slightly NSFW)
Listen
Learn
Cry
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
F**king great
We have new neighbors. Actually, they're not new, I've just been ignoring them to the best of my ability since they arrived in the spring. Why would I spend so much effort trying to convince myself the house next door was empty and I was having a bad dream?
Let's see:
1) Their creepy, soon to be a rapist/serial killer son. This kid has not been in school a day since they arrived in April. Yes, I'm aware kids don't go to school in the summer, but they do in the Spring. I'll calling child services if he isn't in school this fall. Believe me, if you saw these people you'd know they're not home-schooling. This is the same kid we saw running down the street naked one night... on a dare... from his father... for a cigarette (thanks for reminding me Shannon).
2) Fat, bitchy, retared wife. How did she spend her summer? Pregnant, smoking, drinking, and yelling at her kids.
3) The parade of random people in and out of the house partying all the time. And by people, I mean those folks that make you instantly buy stronger locks.
4) The trash.... in the street, in their yard, in my yard.
5) "Lawnmower? What's that?" Seriously did not touch the yard for months. I even lent them a mower one day. The "father" said he was buying one next week. Next week? Creepy kid is on my doorstep trying to borrow the mower again.
6) The multiple kids, by multiple fathers, yelling... all day, every day.
7) I met the fathers dad. "Well, he had his problems with drugs but he's gotten it under control now". He told me this while leaning over my fence.... shirtless.... fat.... drinking a natty ice... through a mouthful of holes where presumably teeth used to be.
And multiple other reasons. Anyway, today the final shoe was dropped. I can no longer pretend I don't live next door to a Jerry Springer out-takes reel. Why? This. As I suspected, they're juggalos.
Let's see:
1) Their creepy, soon to be a rapist/serial killer son. This kid has not been in school a day since they arrived in April. Yes, I'm aware kids don't go to school in the summer, but they do in the Spring. I'll calling child services if he isn't in school this fall. Believe me, if you saw these people you'd know they're not home-schooling. This is the same kid we saw running down the street naked one night... on a dare... from his father... for a cigarette (thanks for reminding me Shannon).
2) Fat, bitchy, retared wife. How did she spend her summer? Pregnant, smoking, drinking, and yelling at her kids.
3) The parade of random people in and out of the house partying all the time. And by people, I mean those folks that make you instantly buy stronger locks.
4) The trash.... in the street, in their yard, in my yard.
5) "Lawnmower? What's that?" Seriously did not touch the yard for months. I even lent them a mower one day. The "father" said he was buying one next week. Next week? Creepy kid is on my doorstep trying to borrow the mower again.
6) The multiple kids, by multiple fathers, yelling... all day, every day.
7) I met the fathers dad. "Well, he had his problems with drugs but he's gotten it under control now". He told me this while leaning over my fence.... shirtless.... fat.... drinking a natty ice... through a mouthful of holes where presumably teeth used to be.
And multiple other reasons. Anyway, today the final shoe was dropped. I can no longer pretend I don't live next door to a Jerry Springer out-takes reel. Why? This. As I suspected, they're juggalos.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
OK do this RIGHT NOW
Hop on fear.net on On Demand and watch "The Devils Backbone".
Seriously, do it. Now
Guillermo del Toro is f**king brilliant.
Much like some of his other work, it's a touching story beautifully told and WELL worth the time to watch it. I was blown away. His films kind of remind me of the Coen brothers, though perhaps without the tongue in cheek humor. Take an extremely well written story, cast some talented and not always well known actors, and combine it with cinematography that is nothing short of stunning. What do you get? A wonderful film that's a pleasure to watch.
Seriously, do it. Now
Guillermo del Toro is f**king brilliant.
Much like some of his other work, it's a touching story beautifully told and WELL worth the time to watch it. I was blown away. His films kind of remind me of the Coen brothers, though perhaps without the tongue in cheek humor. Take an extremely well written story, cast some talented and not always well known actors, and combine it with cinematography that is nothing short of stunning. What do you get? A wonderful film that's a pleasure to watch.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Why I want to be an olympic swimmer
So I can gather before the press photographers of the world and have them gaze in awe at my unit.
Seriously, how awesome is this suit? I'd wear that EVERYWHERE!
Seriously, how awesome is this suit? I'd wear that EVERYWHERE!
The "debate".
Personally, I'm deeply saddened that at this late date we as a society are still even remotely interested in how our presidential candidates stack up as Christians, or what some blowhard hypocrite who makes a fortune fleecing the very sheep he pretends to shepard thinks are the pressing questions of the day. Benevolent sky grandpa is not going to save America folks.
That being said, I found this to be a very interesting take, from a Christian slant, on the questions that SHOULD have been asked.
Also, this. Yeah, like you'd expect anything else from the "morality squad".
That being said, I found this to be a very interesting take, from a Christian slant, on the questions that SHOULD have been asked.
Also, this. Yeah, like you'd expect anything else from the "morality squad".
Friday, August 15, 2008
Does it ever end?
"Bullying and intimidation are not acceptable ways to conduct foreign policy in the 21st century" - W.
Really?
It wouldn't shock me at all if President Medvedev, after he stopped laughing, just told W. to fuck right off.
Here's one of my biggest fears regarding what this jackass has done to America. Not only have we burned through a good deal of the political good will we'd spent decades building up (not everywhere, but a lot of places) we've also lost what was an extremely tenuous grasp on the moral high ground.
What will our foreign/domestic policy argument be now? "Do as we say, not as we do"? Yeah, that has a great track record. Seriously, great. Yup, great.
Really?
It wouldn't shock me at all if President Medvedev, after he stopped laughing, just told W. to fuck right off.
Here's one of my biggest fears regarding what this jackass has done to America. Not only have we burned through a good deal of the political good will we'd spent decades building up (not everywhere, but a lot of places) we've also lost what was an extremely tenuous grasp on the moral high ground.
What will our foreign/domestic policy argument be now? "Do as we say, not as we do"? Yeah, that has a great track record. Seriously, great. Yup, great.
Monday, August 11, 2008
A balanced energy program
Not so much balance as in using different resources but as in balancing our need for fuel and our need to get rid of some societal waste.
Also, quote of the day:
Shannon (on her new phone): I like it
John: What's it do better?
Shannon: just better feel, better buttons, more eels.
Also, quote of the day:
Shannon (on her new phone): I like it
John: What's it do better?
Shannon: just better feel, better buttons, more eels.
Friday, August 08, 2008
Obama the anti-christ?
From Time magazine:
"It's not easy to make the infamous Willie Horton ad from the 1988 presidential campaign seem benign. But suggesting that Barack Obama is the Antichrist might just do it.
That's just what some outraged Christian supporters of the Democratic nominee are claiming John McCain's campaign did in an ad called "The One" that was recently released online. The Republican nominee's advisers brush off the charges, arguing that the spot was meant to be a "creative" and "humorous" way of poking fun at Obama's popularity by painting him as a self-appointed messiah. But even this innocuous interpretation of the ad — which includes images of Charlton Heston as Moses and culled clips that make Obama sound truly egomaniacal — taps into a conversation that has been gaining urgency on Christian radio, political blogs, and in widely-circulated email messages that accuse Obama of being the Antichrist.
The ad was the creation of Fred Davis, one of McCain's top media gurus, as well as a close friend of former Christian Coalition head Ralph Reed and the nephew of conservative Oklahoma Senator James Inhofe. It first caught the attention of Democrats familiar with the Left Behind series, a fictionalized account of the end time that debuted in the 1990s and has sold nearly 70 million books worldwide. "The language in there is so similar to the language in the Left Behind books," says Tony Campolo, a leading progressive evangelical speaker and author.
As the ad begins, the words "It should be known that in 2008 the world shall be blessed. They will call him The One" flash across the screen. The Antichrist of the Left Behind books is a charismatic young political leader named Nicolae Carpathia who founds The One World religion (slogan: "We are God") and promises to heal the world after a time of deep division. One of several Obama clips in the ad features the senator saying, "A nation healed, a world repaired. We are the ones that we've been waiting for."
The visual images in the ad, which Davis says has been viewed even more than the McCain's "Celeb" ad linking Obama to the likes of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, also seem to evoke the cover art of several Left Behind books. But they're not the cartoonish images of clouds parting and shining light upon Obama that might be expected in an ad spoofing him as a messiah. Instead, the screen displays a sinister orange light surrounded by darkness and later the faint image of a staircase leading up to heaven.
Perhaps the most puzzling scene in the ad is an altered segment from The 10 Commandments that appears near the end. A Moses-playing Charlton Heston parts the animated waters of the Red Sea, out of which rises the quasi-presidential seal the Obama campaign used for a brief time earlier this summer before being mocked into retiring it. The seal, which features an eagle with wings spread, is not recognizable like the campaign's red-white-and-blue "O" logo. That confused Democratic consultant Eric Sapp until he went to his Bible and remembered that in the apocalyptic Book of Daniel, the Antichrist is described as rising from the sea as a creature with wings like an eagle.
Sapp knows that the phrasing and images could just be dismissed as a peculiar coincidence. After all, it was Oprah Winfrey who told an Iowa crowd that Obama was "the one!" But, he insists, "the frequency of these images and references don't make any sense unless you're trying to send the message that Obama could be the Antichrist." Mara Vanderslice, another Democratic consultant who handled religious outreach for the 2004 Kerry campaign, agrees. "If they wanted to be funny, if they really wanted to play up the idea that Obama thinks he's the Second Coming, there were better ways to do it," she says. "Why use these awkward lines like, 'And the world will receive his blessings'?"
Wow...
Just... wow.
Anyway, here's the video, judge for yourself.
"It's not easy to make the infamous Willie Horton ad from the 1988 presidential campaign seem benign. But suggesting that Barack Obama is the Antichrist might just do it.
That's just what some outraged Christian supporters of the Democratic nominee are claiming John McCain's campaign did in an ad called "The One" that was recently released online. The Republican nominee's advisers brush off the charges, arguing that the spot was meant to be a "creative" and "humorous" way of poking fun at Obama's popularity by painting him as a self-appointed messiah. But even this innocuous interpretation of the ad — which includes images of Charlton Heston as Moses and culled clips that make Obama sound truly egomaniacal — taps into a conversation that has been gaining urgency on Christian radio, political blogs, and in widely-circulated email messages that accuse Obama of being the Antichrist.
The ad was the creation of Fred Davis, one of McCain's top media gurus, as well as a close friend of former Christian Coalition head Ralph Reed and the nephew of conservative Oklahoma Senator James Inhofe. It first caught the attention of Democrats familiar with the Left Behind series, a fictionalized account of the end time that debuted in the 1990s and has sold nearly 70 million books worldwide. "The language in there is so similar to the language in the Left Behind books," says Tony Campolo, a leading progressive evangelical speaker and author.
As the ad begins, the words "It should be known that in 2008 the world shall be blessed. They will call him The One" flash across the screen. The Antichrist of the Left Behind books is a charismatic young political leader named Nicolae Carpathia who founds The One World religion (slogan: "We are God") and promises to heal the world after a time of deep division. One of several Obama clips in the ad features the senator saying, "A nation healed, a world repaired. We are the ones that we've been waiting for."
The visual images in the ad, which Davis says has been viewed even more than the McCain's "Celeb" ad linking Obama to the likes of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, also seem to evoke the cover art of several Left Behind books. But they're not the cartoonish images of clouds parting and shining light upon Obama that might be expected in an ad spoofing him as a messiah. Instead, the screen displays a sinister orange light surrounded by darkness and later the faint image of a staircase leading up to heaven.
Perhaps the most puzzling scene in the ad is an altered segment from The 10 Commandments that appears near the end. A Moses-playing Charlton Heston parts the animated waters of the Red Sea, out of which rises the quasi-presidential seal the Obama campaign used for a brief time earlier this summer before being mocked into retiring it. The seal, which features an eagle with wings spread, is not recognizable like the campaign's red-white-and-blue "O" logo. That confused Democratic consultant Eric Sapp until he went to his Bible and remembered that in the apocalyptic Book of Daniel, the Antichrist is described as rising from the sea as a creature with wings like an eagle.
Sapp knows that the phrasing and images could just be dismissed as a peculiar coincidence. After all, it was Oprah Winfrey who told an Iowa crowd that Obama was "the one!" But, he insists, "the frequency of these images and references don't make any sense unless you're trying to send the message that Obama could be the Antichrist." Mara Vanderslice, another Democratic consultant who handled religious outreach for the 2004 Kerry campaign, agrees. "If they wanted to be funny, if they really wanted to play up the idea that Obama thinks he's the Second Coming, there were better ways to do it," she says. "Why use these awkward lines like, 'And the world will receive his blessings'?"
Wow...
Just... wow.
Anyway, here's the video, judge for yourself.
Thursday, August 07, 2008
My Birthday
OK, this will probably ramble and be full of errors because the celebration is winding down, but so be it.
Today I turned 39 and I'd like to record a few things.
First, I don't usually make a big deal out of birthdays. I don't feel that the anniversary of my occupation of a body is exceptionally important. If my hope is born out in reality, it's happened before and it will happen again. It's no more significant that getting back in line for a roller coaster. I've chosen other dates to assign importance to, but even those are purely personal... I don't think they really mean anything.
That being said, I'm human. I try to be as humble as I can because I think it's important, but every now and then a guy wants to be recognized. So, I'd to thank some folks for making me feel a little special.
A couple people from my old job unexpectedly remembered my birthday. It caught me by surprise, and I really appreciate it. Kind of a sweet reminder of a good time and a hard lesson.
Also, everyone at Cava. You folks are always nice, but it really felt good to have everyone acknowledge that tonight was a little different. I'm diggin' you guys hard.
Next, thanks to my lovely wife for making everything easy and knowing exactly what I wanted even though I'd never say so myself. It's just one of the thousands of reasons I love her and I'm SO, SO, SO glad she's my best friend EVAR!
Next, I gave myself a reward tonight. First for getting my health together, and next for being about where I should be at this age. I had a hamburger. I haven't had one in a while, and the Cava guys made me what seemed to be an extra fat, extra rare one... Just the way I like them. God damn it was good.
I also had a monkey tail. For those of you that don't know, I like "fair food". Shave ice, hot dogs, giant pretzels, I love it all. Of course, you can't eat this all the time so when I do I really dig it. As fate would have it, Cava had a fancy monkey tail (frozen banana, dipped in chocolate and rolled in nuts) on the desert menu. It was AWESOME.
Also, there was booze. I like booze.
OK, so what do I want to work on as I head towards 40?
1) Keep working towards better health. My excursion into depression taught me that once your body starts revolting against you, you're fucked. I don't want to be fucked again. My goal is to keep the machine running as long as I can, because now that I've seen both the upside and the downside I really, really dig the upside. When I say "another day in paradise", I'm only half kidding. I want to stay here awhile.
2) Tolerance. I say this every year, and I get better every year... But I still have a way to go. It runs in the family. Judy men are always right (whether they are or not), and have a VERY short fuse when it comes to people who can't catch on right away. I've realized that it's healthier and more human if I can relax and give people a chance to catch up, but it's really hard. I'm hoping to make a breakthrough or two in this area this year.
3) See if I can't manage to grow a little bit. We're all missing something, and we all look for it in our own way. I'm going to try to find a chunk of it. If feel like I've got the head under control. The next project is to see what we can do with the heart. Wish me luck.
4) Patience. Things seem to happen better for me when I don't try to rush them. It's hard sometimes... I feel like I KNOW where things have to be and I just want them to hurry up and get there, so I push. Funny thing is, when I push they happen... But in ways I didn't expect and don't necessarily like. I just gotta roll with the punches a little better. The ox is slow, but the earth is patient.
5) Increase the love, decrease the rage. Shit's gonna happen. My first reaction is usually to want to hit it with a hammer and laugh while it bleeds. It tends to work out better if I just grab the shitty situation/person/whatever, give it a hug, and remember that it's all going to work out in the end. I need to remember this.
I guess the main theme is I know how the book ends. I need to quit trying to rewrite it. Life seems to work much better when I get out of the way.
We'll see how that goes.
Today I turned 39 and I'd like to record a few things.
First, I don't usually make a big deal out of birthdays. I don't feel that the anniversary of my occupation of a body is exceptionally important. If my hope is born out in reality, it's happened before and it will happen again. It's no more significant that getting back in line for a roller coaster. I've chosen other dates to assign importance to, but even those are purely personal... I don't think they really mean anything.
That being said, I'm human. I try to be as humble as I can because I think it's important, but every now and then a guy wants to be recognized. So, I'd to thank some folks for making me feel a little special.
A couple people from my old job unexpectedly remembered my birthday. It caught me by surprise, and I really appreciate it. Kind of a sweet reminder of a good time and a hard lesson.
Also, everyone at Cava. You folks are always nice, but it really felt good to have everyone acknowledge that tonight was a little different. I'm diggin' you guys hard.
Next, thanks to my lovely wife for making everything easy and knowing exactly what I wanted even though I'd never say so myself. It's just one of the thousands of reasons I love her and I'm SO, SO, SO glad she's my best friend EVAR!
Next, I gave myself a reward tonight. First for getting my health together, and next for being about where I should be at this age. I had a hamburger. I haven't had one in a while, and the Cava guys made me what seemed to be an extra fat, extra rare one... Just the way I like them. God damn it was good.
I also had a monkey tail. For those of you that don't know, I like "fair food". Shave ice, hot dogs, giant pretzels, I love it all. Of course, you can't eat this all the time so when I do I really dig it. As fate would have it, Cava had a fancy monkey tail (frozen banana, dipped in chocolate and rolled in nuts) on the desert menu. It was AWESOME.
Also, there was booze. I like booze.
OK, so what do I want to work on as I head towards 40?
1) Keep working towards better health. My excursion into depression taught me that once your body starts revolting against you, you're fucked. I don't want to be fucked again. My goal is to keep the machine running as long as I can, because now that I've seen both the upside and the downside I really, really dig the upside. When I say "another day in paradise", I'm only half kidding. I want to stay here awhile.
2) Tolerance. I say this every year, and I get better every year... But I still have a way to go. It runs in the family. Judy men are always right (whether they are or not), and have a VERY short fuse when it comes to people who can't catch on right away. I've realized that it's healthier and more human if I can relax and give people a chance to catch up, but it's really hard. I'm hoping to make a breakthrough or two in this area this year.
3) See if I can't manage to grow a little bit. We're all missing something, and we all look for it in our own way. I'm going to try to find a chunk of it. If feel like I've got the head under control. The next project is to see what we can do with the heart. Wish me luck.
4) Patience. Things seem to happen better for me when I don't try to rush them. It's hard sometimes... I feel like I KNOW where things have to be and I just want them to hurry up and get there, so I push. Funny thing is, when I push they happen... But in ways I didn't expect and don't necessarily like. I just gotta roll with the punches a little better. The ox is slow, but the earth is patient.
5) Increase the love, decrease the rage. Shit's gonna happen. My first reaction is usually to want to hit it with a hammer and laugh while it bleeds. It tends to work out better if I just grab the shitty situation/person/whatever, give it a hug, and remember that it's all going to work out in the end. I need to remember this.
I guess the main theme is I know how the book ends. I need to quit trying to rewrite it. Life seems to work much better when I get out of the way.
We'll see how that goes.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Rascism?
I was wondering if the this bothers anyone else. You're reading along in an article, and an authority or something is cited, but preceded by their race. There's an example here. "Captured by legendary Chicano photographer George Rodriguez"...
Ok, I have a BUNCH of problems here
1) Chicano photographer. Is that somehow different than a "regular" photographer? Does Cannon make a special line of Chicano cameras? Can I take a "Chicano photography" class to learn to shoot like a "Chicano photographer"? Does he ONLY take pictures of Chicanos?
2) What does this add to the narrative? Is there something in his work that I'll really only understand if I know he's Chicano? Why do I need to know that the photographer is Chicano? I can't find a reason, save the author or the people the author is trying to represent wanting to seem "multiculturally sensitive" or politically correct or some shit. So, that being the case.... What's more insensitive and offensive: "legendary Chicano photographer George Rodriguez" or "legendary photographer George Rodriguez"?
3) What about whitey? You NEVER see "legendary Anglo photographer Ansel Adams". Why not? It seems to me that either we don't warrant special identification, presumably because we've all led lives of privilege since our ancestors stepped off the Mayflower and on to the backs of the natives (BTW try being poor, undereducated, and white sometime... I've been there. It's not fun.) OR it's assumed that if you're competent at your vocation you must be white. If you're NOT white and you manage to become competent, we'd better point that out. Either one of these too options seem inherently wrong and stupid to me.
4) George Rodriguez? Chicano? REALLY? Shocker! Didn't see that coming. Next you're going to tell me Hiro Yamamoto is Asian!
Anyway, I think this kind of crap perpetuates stupid racial bickering and distracts from the real issue, which I happen to believe is socioeconomic class. I still contend that 90% of the "race issue" isn't black vs. white or whatever, it's rich (comparatively speaking... and not) vs. poor.
Also, this (the example) bolsters my opinion that Zach de la Rocha is a massive blowhard douche bag and even more of a demagogue than the people he rails against.
Ok, I have a BUNCH of problems here
1) Chicano photographer. Is that somehow different than a "regular" photographer? Does Cannon make a special line of Chicano cameras? Can I take a "Chicano photography" class to learn to shoot like a "Chicano photographer"? Does he ONLY take pictures of Chicanos?
2) What does this add to the narrative? Is there something in his work that I'll really only understand if I know he's Chicano? Why do I need to know that the photographer is Chicano? I can't find a reason, save the author or the people the author is trying to represent wanting to seem "multiculturally sensitive" or politically correct or some shit. So, that being the case.... What's more insensitive and offensive: "legendary Chicano photographer George Rodriguez" or "legendary photographer George Rodriguez"?
3) What about whitey? You NEVER see "legendary Anglo photographer Ansel Adams". Why not? It seems to me that either we don't warrant special identification, presumably because we've all led lives of privilege since our ancestors stepped off the Mayflower and on to the backs of the natives (BTW try being poor, undereducated, and white sometime... I've been there. It's not fun.) OR it's assumed that if you're competent at your vocation you must be white. If you're NOT white and you manage to become competent, we'd better point that out. Either one of these too options seem inherently wrong and stupid to me.
4) George Rodriguez? Chicano? REALLY? Shocker! Didn't see that coming. Next you're going to tell me Hiro Yamamoto is Asian!
Anyway, I think this kind of crap perpetuates stupid racial bickering and distracts from the real issue, which I happen to believe is socioeconomic class. I still contend that 90% of the "race issue" isn't black vs. white or whatever, it's rich (comparatively speaking... and not) vs. poor.
Also, this (the example) bolsters my opinion that Zach de la Rocha is a massive blowhard douche bag and even more of a demagogue than the people he rails against.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Summer of fun
So far this summer, we've spent every weekend doing something fun. This was the first weekend we actually planned to stay in Portland. This didn't work out. I couldn't be happier. Rafting is super happy fun.
I THINK we'll make it next weekend, but there will be a little something going on here. It will involve hot chicks and booze.
While I prefer hot chick and motorcycles, I like hot chicks and booze.
I THINK we'll make it next weekend, but there will be a little something going on here. It will involve hot chicks and booze.
While I prefer hot chick and motorcycles, I like hot chicks and booze.
Friday, August 01, 2008
Grab the gusto!
I don't care if Pabst is retard hipster beer, I like it. I drank cheap beer when it wasn't fashionable, and I will do so now that it is. When it falls out of fashion, I will continue to drink cheap beer. Maybe it will come into fashion one more time.... I'll still be there, swilling cheap beer, perhaps out of a straw at that point.
Then I will die.
Anyway, some GREAT news for fans of cheap beer. Schlitz is back! I remember when this had pull tabs, and I seem to remember steel cans. I can't wait to take a drunken stumble down memory lane.
Then I will die.
Anyway, some GREAT news for fans of cheap beer. Schlitz is back! I remember when this had pull tabs, and I seem to remember steel cans. I can't wait to take a drunken stumble down memory lane.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
The amazing shrinking John.... The saga continues
Hit 225 today. My body fat percentage has gone from obese to firmly in the overweight region.
Back when I was racing bicycles, I tipped the scale at between 215 and 220. Soooooo close. My legs aren't as awesome as they were then, but my arms look better and really what do chicks dig more than two tickets to the gun show? NOTHING that's what!
I still haven't cashed my KFC check, but I will... I will.
The bad thing? I need new pants. Seriously, even my skinny jeans are too big now. Put this on top of the fact that I broke my KLR (again) and this will be an expensive month for John. I guess I can don my new vest and make a little cash.
I am a little pissed to find out I could have just been popping these things instead of doing daily doubles 5 days a week.
Back when I was racing bicycles, I tipped the scale at between 215 and 220. Soooooo close. My legs aren't as awesome as they were then, but my arms look better and really what do chicks dig more than two tickets to the gun show? NOTHING that's what!
I still haven't cashed my KFC check, but I will... I will.
The bad thing? I need new pants. Seriously, even my skinny jeans are too big now. Put this on top of the fact that I broke my KLR (again) and this will be an expensive month for John. I guess I can don my new vest and make a little cash.
I am a little pissed to find out I could have just been popping these things instead of doing daily doubles 5 days a week.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Our weekend
July has been made of awesome. We capped it off with another trip to Pendleton. I would tell you about it, but Shannon did a much better job so this is a PERFECT opportunity for me to plug her blog.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you strippylongstocking.com. Dive into all the awesomeness that is Shannon.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you strippylongstocking.com. Dive into all the awesomeness that is Shannon.
A hero's story
Apparently, I'm not the only one who sees the clear and present danger presented by bees and their ilk. Though I don't have a white leather clad Arab to assist me in my battle, battle on I will.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Hallelujah! He speaks English!
Apparently, I'm not the only one who's a little tired of the Obama as second coming business. Yes, it's nice to have someone who can string a sentence together speaking for America for a change... But c'mon you know it's mostly just the same old shit in another package.
I almost feel sorry for zombie McCain. I've always liked and respected the guy, and in a different world (Bush free) I may have even voted for him (I tend to vote for people and issues, not parties). However I don't think he's got a snowballs chance in hell and he really comes off bad in comparison.
Anyway, thanks to the British for their advanced sense of satire and thanks to my Aunt Carol for pointing this out.
I almost feel sorry for zombie McCain. I've always liked and respected the guy, and in a different world (Bush free) I may have even voted for him (I tend to vote for people and issues, not parties). However I don't think he's got a snowballs chance in hell and he really comes off bad in comparison.
Anyway, thanks to the British for their advanced sense of satire and thanks to my Aunt Carol for pointing this out.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
It's all in the context I guess....
For some reason this headline struck me as odd. Is she scared that she'll be forced to rape an entire city?
"Whew! Am I glad! I have finally left "city". Now I can be happy."
"Uh, we're going to have to ask you to return to "city". Actually, we insist."
"What? Why? Did I forget something."
"Um, no. We need you to rape "city". All of it. The whole place."
"Crap."
Understandable. That's a lot of rape. Or is there a place called Rape City that she doesn't want to return to? Again, understandable. Imagine going to Rape City....
"Hey Dad, where are we going on vacation this year? Disneyland? Yellowstone?"
"No, Billy. We're going to Rape City!!!!"
"Boo. I hate you Dad"
"I know Billy... I know."
"Whew! Am I glad! I have finally left "city". Now I can be happy."
"Uh, we're going to have to ask you to return to "city". Actually, we insist."
"What? Why? Did I forget something."
"Um, no. We need you to rape "city". All of it. The whole place."
"Crap."
Understandable. That's a lot of rape. Or is there a place called Rape City that she doesn't want to return to? Again, understandable. Imagine going to Rape City....
"Hey Dad, where are we going on vacation this year? Disneyland? Yellowstone?"
"No, Billy. We're going to Rape City!!!!"
"Boo. I hate you Dad"
"I know Billy... I know."
Sunday, July 20, 2008
On motorcycling
For those of you that don't know, I love motorcycles. I got my first dirt bike around 10 and my first street bike at 17. I've owned many, many bikes and I've loved every one for different reasons.
As one of the cornucopia of lucky breaks I've had in my life, I managed to stumble across a woman who may not love the machines as much as I do (or perhaps does, but not in the same way), but shares my love of operating them.
As I was contemplating these two things this weekend, it occurred to me that I had actually found what millions and millions of people search their whole lives for.
When I am on the motorcycle with Shannon, exploring a unknown road, on a perfect day, I firmly believe I am experiencing true happiness in the most absolutely literal sense of the words. I really couldn't ask for more. I want nothing else. I am complete.
While I was riding, I remember fervently and repeatedly hoping that if there is a "heaven", it's a place where I get to ride new roads with Shannon, seeing new sights, meeting new people.... forever. The time I spend doing it seems to pass so quickly, and no matter how long we spend traveling this way I never want to stop. I believe given the time I could ride every road on the Earth, stop at every interesting small town bar, stay in every funky hotel, swap stories with every gas station attendant, and when I was done my only wish would be to ship the bike to the next planet and do it all over again.
I intend to write an essay on why motorcycles are capable of bringing this sort of satori about, but not yet. There's too much to say. I'll make a feeble attempt at some point, but for now I'll say that those of you who do it know what I'm talking about... which is why you do it. Suffice to say, something magical happens when you trade the destination for the journey. It kinda looks like this:
OK.. OK... Lest any of you think I'm not the moron you've come to know and tolerate, my version of heaven includes killing bugs... Don't wanna get too existential :)
As one of the cornucopia of lucky breaks I've had in my life, I managed to stumble across a woman who may not love the machines as much as I do (or perhaps does, but not in the same way), but shares my love of operating them.
As I was contemplating these two things this weekend, it occurred to me that I had actually found what millions and millions of people search their whole lives for.
When I am on the motorcycle with Shannon, exploring a unknown road, on a perfect day, I firmly believe I am experiencing true happiness in the most absolutely literal sense of the words. I really couldn't ask for more. I want nothing else. I am complete.
While I was riding, I remember fervently and repeatedly hoping that if there is a "heaven", it's a place where I get to ride new roads with Shannon, seeing new sights, meeting new people.... forever. The time I spend doing it seems to pass so quickly, and no matter how long we spend traveling this way I never want to stop. I believe given the time I could ride every road on the Earth, stop at every interesting small town bar, stay in every funky hotel, swap stories with every gas station attendant, and when I was done my only wish would be to ship the bike to the next planet and do it all over again.
I intend to write an essay on why motorcycles are capable of bringing this sort of satori about, but not yet. There's too much to say. I'll make a feeble attempt at some point, but for now I'll say that those of you who do it know what I'm talking about... which is why you do it. Suffice to say, something magical happens when you trade the destination for the journey. It kinda looks like this:
OK.. OK... Lest any of you think I'm not the moron you've come to know and tolerate, my version of heaven includes killing bugs... Don't wanna get too existential :)
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Friday, July 11, 2008
229! The amazing shrinking John part II.
I have officially earned my KFC reward. Yes it's gross but god help me I love it so. However, instead of claiming my reward, I intend to truck my ass back out to Hamley's this weekend and have a steak... and some bourbon... and perhaps another dip in the pool. I'll spare you the photo this time.
Sunday, July 06, 2008
4th of July
We had a great time. LOTS of motorcycle miles, met cool people, found a great restaurant, etc. etc. However, I did take a break from my recent excursion into sobriety. John + Bourbon + Swimming pool =
Also, that is a steak distended belly. Seriously, not that fat. No really. Thanks, Hamley's.
Also the water was cold. Just sayin'. Thanks Andy, you dick.
Also, that is a steak distended belly. Seriously, not that fat. No really. Thanks, Hamley's.
Also the water was cold. Just sayin'. Thanks Andy, you dick.
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
10 Things You Can Like About $4 Gas
I think this article brings about some interesting points, though I fear that many of them are wishful thinking rather than fact. I do however think they missed my personal favorite.... Schadenfreude. Personally, I get a big kick out of watching the morons driving hummers and escalades suffering. The way I see it, we're moving very, very slowly towards a world where stupidity is painful and I couldn't be happier.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Do you believe me now?
Well you should! This time they took control of a truck in their never ending quest for STINGING!!! Seriously, they're getting smarter and meaner BY THE DAY! WAKE UP PEOPLE!
Monday, June 30, 2008
OMG It's my worst nightmare
When this happens in Portland (and it will... I've warned you all countless times), all you will see is a streak of smoke heading out of town. That streak will be the smoke left by John, running from the apian horde.
"Strong said the experts onsite have reported the situation is under control and there is no reason for the public to panic.
However, anyone with bee allergies and at a risk of anaphylactic shock should leave the area until the situation has been resolved, Strong said."
Bullshit. They ALWAYS say the "situation is under control". Those are the last words you hear before you perish in a storm of buzzing and stinging! ANYONE WHO WANTS TO LIVE should get the hell out of there PRONTO!!!! Bees are flying packets of sting and hate! Honey is only a by product of the sting production process! These ones are mad (like all bees) and READY FOR WAR (also, like all bees).
"Strong said the experts onsite have reported the situation is under control and there is no reason for the public to panic.
However, anyone with bee allergies and at a risk of anaphylactic shock should leave the area until the situation has been resolved, Strong said."
Bullshit. They ALWAYS say the "situation is under control". Those are the last words you hear before you perish in a storm of buzzing and stinging! ANYONE WHO WANTS TO LIVE should get the hell out of there PRONTO!!!! Bees are flying packets of sting and hate! Honey is only a by product of the sting production process! These ones are mad (like all bees) and READY FOR WAR (also, like all bees).
Jesus for President
Sigh... Listen, if you folks want to have imaginary friends that's OK. If you want to blindly follow the 213,432,453,123,429,783rd hand teachings of someone who lived thousands of years ago in a culture you couldn't possible understand, that's great. Just please, KEEP THIS SHIT TO YOURSELVES.
Also, why am I not surprised that the idea came from someone who looks like this:
"DUDE I SMOKED THE BIBLE & NOW I HAS KNOWLEDGE! BOB MARLEY LIVES IN MY RASTA VIBES! GOT ANY SPARE CHANGE?".
Who would Jesus vote for? Who knows/cares? It's like asking how Lucy would fair on the NASCAR circuit. It's a stupid question asked by stupid people.
Also, why am I not surprised that the idea came from someone who looks like this:
"DUDE I SMOKED THE BIBLE & NOW I HAS KNOWLEDGE! BOB MARLEY LIVES IN MY RASTA VIBES! GOT ANY SPARE CHANGE?".
Who would Jesus vote for? Who knows/cares? It's like asking how Lucy would fair on the NASCAR circuit. It's a stupid question asked by stupid people.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
The more they try to bring him down...
The more they convince me I picked the right horse in this race. "He's the guy at the country club with the beautiful date, holding a martini and a cigarette that stands against the wall and makes snide comments about everyone." Sounds like my kind of guy. After 8 years of the dipshit with the hummer drinking a natty ice, I'm ready for a guy who realizes that the lowest common denominator is not always the best thing to be. Seriously, do you want James Bond running the country or Larry the Cable Guy?
An interesting take...
...on the political and military (not to mention moral) bankruptcy of the current war in Iraq by a Marine. Basically, he's stating that if you ignore (or force others to ignore) evidence that you've made a mistake in deciding to engage, and you apply correctly military doctrine in that engagement, you succeed in turning what could be your greatest asset into your greatest liability.
Taking this a bit further, another fundamental tenet of armed conflict is to disguise both your strengths and your weaknesses. Interestingly enough, in the current conflict we've managed to put ourselves into a situation where doing this is next to impossible, so the fact that we've made the mistake of preserving in a mistaken course is broadcast to those who have been praying we would do just that.
Taking this a bit further, another fundamental tenet of armed conflict is to disguise both your strengths and your weaknesses. Interestingly enough, in the current conflict we've managed to put ourselves into a situation where doing this is next to impossible, so the fact that we've made the mistake of preserving in a mistaken course is broadcast to those who have been praying we would do just that.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
And here we go...
I wondered how long it would take for these assholes to chime in.
"Evangelicals are people who take Bible interpretation very seriously, and the sort of speech he gave shows that he is worlds away in the views of evangelicals". Which is exactly why thinking people (as opposed to evangelicals) should be looking at Obama, and while I'll be voting for him.
Here is everything you need to know about evangelicals, summed up in one image:
"Evangelicals are people who take Bible interpretation very seriously, and the sort of speech he gave shows that he is worlds away in the views of evangelicals". Which is exactly why thinking people (as opposed to evangelicals) should be looking at Obama, and while I'll be voting for him.
Here is everything you need to know about evangelicals, summed up in one image:
Sunday, June 22, 2008
G.I. John
As part of a Army program to encourage employers not to be dicks to their employees who serve in the National Guard, Nick and I were invited to spend a day at Fort Lewis and participate in operation "Tacoma Thrust" (LOL). As a fan and student of all thing military, I was needless to say thrilled.
The day started with a run through of a field tactical operations center and an MRE. The TOC was a real eye-opener. Anyone who's studied how military organizations and conflict knows that more than anything it's all about logistics. I knew this coming into it, but I was blown away by just how organized these guys are. Also, while the MRE gets a bad rap, and while I'm certain my opinion would change were I to eat them everyday as a soldier in the field, I like 'em. It's a whole bunch of easy to prepare and pretty damn edible food in a nice little bag. I had hot roast beef and veggies... I'd eat it again. Also, you can use the heating chemicals to make a little bomb, which is awesome.
Next was the short distance firing range. This is where soldiers get comfortable and proficient with their weapons in the situations where they'll most likely be using them... Distances of 50 meters or less. We were given a short course on the M4 and M68 CCO and then were treated to the best part of the day... Getting a little return on my tax dollars by expending a few hundred rounds of military ammo. The weapons is very light, easy to operate, accurate, and FUN. Burst mode, while perhaps not super useful in a tactical situation, is AWESOME for wasting ammo and killing paper men.
We then took part in a training exercise. Basically, it was a simualted convoy being attacked by simulated bad guys. This was a real eye-opener. Getting a bunch of shit from point A to point B while people are trying to kill you is not a trivial task. Here's us getting attacked by a simulated IED and a simulated grenade. By the way, the video does no justice to how loud those things are.
Finally, a truly terrible dinner at the base chow hall and we were off. Personally, I think anyone who eats in the place deserves a medal. Another MRE would have been better.
Anyway, I've always had respect for soldiers. While anyone who knows me knows my opinion of the current war (the Iraq part anyway), I think our soldiers deserve our empathy, support, and the best tools we can give them. My experience on the base enlighted me as to just how hard these folks work and what a bunch of polite, nice, bright people they really are. They don't always get the thanks they should, and I think if everyone could get a little first hand experience with the how hard they work (even in training) that might change.
Anyway, here's some pictures.
The day started with a run through of a field tactical operations center and an MRE. The TOC was a real eye-opener. Anyone who's studied how military organizations and conflict knows that more than anything it's all about logistics. I knew this coming into it, but I was blown away by just how organized these guys are. Also, while the MRE gets a bad rap, and while I'm certain my opinion would change were I to eat them everyday as a soldier in the field, I like 'em. It's a whole bunch of easy to prepare and pretty damn edible food in a nice little bag. I had hot roast beef and veggies... I'd eat it again. Also, you can use the heating chemicals to make a little bomb, which is awesome.
Next was the short distance firing range. This is where soldiers get comfortable and proficient with their weapons in the situations where they'll most likely be using them... Distances of 50 meters or less. We were given a short course on the M4 and M68 CCO and then were treated to the best part of the day... Getting a little return on my tax dollars by expending a few hundred rounds of military ammo. The weapons is very light, easy to operate, accurate, and FUN. Burst mode, while perhaps not super useful in a tactical situation, is AWESOME for wasting ammo and killing paper men.
We then took part in a training exercise. Basically, it was a simualted convoy being attacked by simulated bad guys. This was a real eye-opener. Getting a bunch of shit from point A to point B while people are trying to kill you is not a trivial task. Here's us getting attacked by a simulated IED and a simulated grenade. By the way, the video does no justice to how loud those things are.
Finally, a truly terrible dinner at the base chow hall and we were off. Personally, I think anyone who eats in the place deserves a medal. Another MRE would have been better.
Anyway, I've always had respect for soldiers. While anyone who knows me knows my opinion of the current war (the Iraq part anyway), I think our soldiers deserve our empathy, support, and the best tools we can give them. My experience on the base enlighted me as to just how hard these folks work and what a bunch of polite, nice, bright people they really are. They don't always get the thanks they should, and I think if everyone could get a little first hand experience with the how hard they work (even in training) that might change.
Anyway, here's some pictures.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
A little something for the fellas....
Well most of the fellas anyway. I some of the ladies too, I guess. Fine, "a little something for everyone that likes boobies". No, not those THESE. Anyway, here we have an archive of every playmate of the month since Playboy started. Kind of fun to look at what was hot when you were born, graduated high school (OMG THE HAIR), etc. etc. Obviously NSFW.
THANK YOU INTERWEB!1
THANK YOU INTERWEB!1
Thursday, June 19, 2008
The amazing shrinking John!
15 down... 15 (or so) to go....
Also, on a completely unrelated note, remember the show that I emceed for? The one where I got sick and everything sucked? Well check this out. It's the MySpace for the guy behind that fiasco of a club. Once I saw it, the reason behind the vibe in that place was immediately clear.
"Shoot me a line if you would like to come down and check it out. I'm newly single and looking for girls "outside the biz." but I have been known to make exceptions :)"
Sniff, sniff.... Do you smell that? IT'S CLASS, BABY!
Also, on a completely unrelated note, remember the show that I emceed for? The one where I got sick and everything sucked? Well check this out. It's the MySpace for the guy behind that fiasco of a club. Once I saw it, the reason behind the vibe in that place was immediately clear.
"Shoot me a line if you would like to come down and check it out. I'm newly single and looking for girls "outside the biz." but I have been known to make exceptions :)"
Sniff, sniff.... Do you smell that? IT'S CLASS, BABY!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Well Crap...
Shannon left for Maryland again... Which leaves me to my own devices and feeling like a sad dog with snow on his nose.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Slow cooked karma's gonna get you
To borrow a page from Shannon Stone's play book, I'm gonna go ahead and call this karmic retribution for George Bush. Hope God told you to build some Arks! Don't worry though, I'm sure your boy is right on top if it just like he was for those folks in Louisiana!
Crap, I wonder if this means I won't be invited to Cannes next year?
Crap, I wonder if this means I won't be invited to Cannes next year?
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
I've said it before...
...and I'll say it again, and again, and again until you people believe me. BEES ARE NOT OUR FRIENDS. They are mean and they hate us. Not in the "Nrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... they haet r freedums" way but in the "I hate you and I want you to die way".
You may think me irrational now. You may even laugh. But as the final bee butt glistening with venom is angrily thrust into your eye (they LOVE to destroy eyes. It's like going to Disneyland for them), remember I told you so.
You may think me irrational now. You may even laugh. But as the final bee butt glistening with venom is angrily thrust into your eye (they LOVE to destroy eyes. It's like going to Disneyland for them), remember I told you so.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
I have discovered the formula for happiness!!!
Pay attention class...
Home + Nap = Hap
Hap + Pie = Happie, or as the Americans would say "Happy"
So, in order to be happy, one will need to be home, take a nap, and then eat some pie.
Thank you very much. This will be on the mid term.
Home + Nap = Hap
Hap + Pie = Happie, or as the Americans would say "Happy"
So, in order to be happy, one will need to be home, take a nap, and then eat some pie.
Thank you very much. This will be on the mid term.
Thursday, June 05, 2008
Let's hear it for pants!
P is for powerful!
A is for AWESOME!
N is for nice!
T is for terrific!
S is for.... SHIT! Where are mine?!
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PANTS!
Monday, June 02, 2008
Baby I'm a star
So I got to emcee for this show Friday:
Good news? Pretty girls in their underwear and John on stage, however briefly. Bad news? The venue was SKETCHY, drinks were weak and wrong, food ways genuinely dreadful, and I got sick.
Good news? Pretty girls in their underwear and John on stage, however briefly. Bad news? The venue was SKETCHY, drinks were weak and wrong, food ways genuinely dreadful, and I got sick.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Why I love all things Russian.
As some of you know, I have a certain fondness for all things Russian. Maybe it's my slightly over the top love of vodka, maybe it's their ability to consistently produce hot, dumb chicks, maybe it's fact that they produce so much depression it's available for export.
However, they've outdone themselves this time. They took what was an AWESOME grief on Second Life and recreated it (to some extent) in meatspace.
Well played comrades. Well played.
However, they've outdone themselves this time. They took what was an AWESOME grief on Second Life and recreated it (to some extent) in meatspace.
Well played comrades. Well played.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
You didn't see this coming?
Seriously? C'mon... I understand their value proposition, but the guy was/is simply selling something that doesn't exist. You can use all the technology you like and be as vigilant as it is humanly possible to be and you will still fail. You know why? You can't overcome social engineering with the technology/process that is currently in place, and arguably with any technology/process that's going to be available any time some.
Interestingly enough, this story does to a good job of pointing out some of the glaring weaknesses in the system. If the process is only as strong as it's weakest point, and the weakest point is the person with the education level/life skills that puts them behind the counter at a "fast cash"/payday loan type of place, then the process is very, very broken. As long as all that one needs to cash in on someone else's identity is the ability to out smart a high school dropout, there's going to be problems.
In the mean time, I will continue to take the security measures I do now (to avoid being the slowest gazelle) and hope for the best. It does make a fun intellectual exercise though... As we move more and more towards a culture where you no longer physically posses most of your wealth (no cash, no bag of gold dust, goats, etc.) how do we as a society protect that wealth? The possibilities are really endless and the nexus of technology, sociology, security, ethics, privacy and other issues should have us stumbling towards competency (slowly) for decades to come.
Interestingly enough, this story does to a good job of pointing out some of the glaring weaknesses in the system. If the process is only as strong as it's weakest point, and the weakest point is the person with the education level/life skills that puts them behind the counter at a "fast cash"/payday loan type of place, then the process is very, very broken. As long as all that one needs to cash in on someone else's identity is the ability to out smart a high school dropout, there's going to be problems.
In the mean time, I will continue to take the security measures I do now (to avoid being the slowest gazelle) and hope for the best. It does make a fun intellectual exercise though... As we move more and more towards a culture where you no longer physically posses most of your wealth (no cash, no bag of gold dust, goats, etc.) how do we as a society protect that wealth? The possibilities are really endless and the nexus of technology, sociology, security, ethics, privacy and other issues should have us stumbling towards competency (slowly) for decades to come.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
I hate to admit it...
...because it's totally NOT my style, but I find myself really liking this song. It's chaveriffic!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
As some of you may know...
...I hate bees. Seriously, I know they are responsible for making wonderful foods and stuff, but they are also FULL OF STINGS AND HATE. That's why this creeped me out so much. That poor guy. Guy: "Bees why do you chase me!!!! Bees I am falling please stop!!! Bees, my bones are broken and cacti are poking me with sharp needles.... SERIOUSLY I quit! Umm.... Bees.... Dying.... Seriously...." Bees: "LOL, pwned"
By the way, Shannon pointed out that this would make the worse carnival ride EVER. "OK Billy, you have 3 tickets.... You can ride the ferris wheel or BEE CANYON!"
By the way, Shannon pointed out that this would make the worse carnival ride EVER. "OK Billy, you have 3 tickets.... You can ride the ferris wheel or BEE CANYON!"
Thursday, May 15, 2008
If you're blue and you don't know...
...where to go to why don't you go where Carol sits, I mean stands?
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
"He knows what he's doing..."
Oh hell yeah he does!!! 186MPH through the air.... WITHOUT A F'ING PLANE?! As I have long asserted, and as anyone who know me can attest, the Swiss are made of awesome.
Shannon's home town...
...now has a claim to fame. Make sure and watch the video, it's priceless. "People keep asking where the powder and guns were WWWHHHHARRRRGGGGGBBBBLLLLL NRRRRRRRRRR HHURRRRRRRFFFFFF DURFFFFFFFFFFFFFF". BTW (and don't tell them I said this) that Pizza? Tastes like ass. The secret to it's success? THERE'S NO WHERE ELSE TO GET PIZZA FOR LIKE 20 GOD DAMN MILES!!!!!!! If you're used to eating mud, a 7-11 hot dog seems like the best thing ever.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Don't judge me...
But I found this while doing a GIS for "ow my ass". Anyway, I've only read part of it and I like what I see. C'mon, it's f'ing Survivor with toys!
Monday, May 12, 2008
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
I just don't know how to feel....
...about this. One the hand, it's frightening. These insects are responsible for the continued survival of a good deal of our food supply, and they're dying in record numbers for reasons we don't understand. Something is obviously very, very wrong.
On the other hand, I hate bees SO MUCH!
On the other hand, I hate bees SO MUCH!
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
How awesome is this?
Apparently, these little bastards hatched the day before I came back to work in the building. The funny thing is, during my last interview (days before the little ones hatched), I peered out a window on the other side of the building into a nest of baby pigeons. Circle of life, eh?
Today, while in a meeting, I watched papa/mama/whoever leave the nest and soar around the area looking for tasty, tasty snacks for the hawklettes. I smiled the whole time. Good luck and good hunting you little neo-dinosaurs.
Today, while in a meeting, I watched papa/mama/whoever leave the nest and soar around the area looking for tasty, tasty snacks for the hawklettes. I smiled the whole time. Good luck and good hunting you little neo-dinosaurs.
Monday, May 05, 2008
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Thursday, May 01, 2008
Not that I agree with this fella...
...as I personally think discussions like this are mental masturbation (fun, but you don't accomplish much) and I couldn't care less if the filter is ahead or behind, but this is a very interesting read.
It also brings up a question. I think I'm about done with SETI@home. Yeah it's fun to think about and yeah I think it's worthwhile, but I think those spare cycles (and I have LOTS) might be put to better use on a project with more immediate benefits for people currently alive here on Earth. I'm a pragmatist, and growing more pragmatic as I grow older. At this point, I think discussion of possible extra-terrestrial life is about as important as discussion of religion (meaning not very important at all). I'm more interested something real. I know there's a bunch of boinc projects out there. Anyone have a suggestion or a case for a particular one?
Oh, and while I'm asking questions... Do any of you Mac users know how to make the delete key act like a delete key and not a backspace key? It's pissing me off to no end.
It also brings up a question. I think I'm about done with SETI@home. Yeah it's fun to think about and yeah I think it's worthwhile, but I think those spare cycles (and I have LOTS) might be put to better use on a project with more immediate benefits for people currently alive here on Earth. I'm a pragmatist, and growing more pragmatic as I grow older. At this point, I think discussion of possible extra-terrestrial life is about as important as discussion of religion (meaning not very important at all). I'm more interested something real. I know there's a bunch of boinc projects out there. Anyone have a suggestion or a case for a particular one?
Oh, and while I'm asking questions... Do any of you Mac users know how to make the delete key act like a delete key and not a backspace key? It's pissing me off to no end.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Lessons learned
Working in the same building I was before is kinda weird. It's nice because I run into a lot of people I really like all the time. It's odd because I sometimes run into some people I'm not sure how I feel about. Today was a really great example. I ran into a lot of people I was happy to see, and Charlotte (who is AWESOME and who I am ALWAYS happy to see) sent me cookies. I also ran into someone who reminded me that you can tell a lot about someone by the way they treat you when you're down... and you can also tell a lot by the way they treat you when you're back up. I think one of the key things I've taken away from this whole experience is that I need to appreciate my friends every chance I get and trust my judgment more often than I used to. If it looks like an prick and sounds like an prick, it's probably an prick... and all my rationalizing, optimism and forced tolerance won't change that. There are some people who I just don't like. There are some people who just don't like me. There's probably a reason for that.
I'll always try to keep an open mind, because I believe (sincerely... HA! And you thought I didn't believe anything) everyone you meet has something to teach you. However, moving forward I think I'm going to try to remember that I don't owe everyone for every lesson. I think maybe in the future I'll move away from polite but insincere complements to people I don't like or respect but feel some need to keep happy. I'll just do what I've really wanted to all long. Politely disregard them. Civility I owe them, but any wisdom they impart to me has long been bought and paid for.
Anyway, that was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too deep, so here have some kittens.
I'll always try to keep an open mind, because I believe (sincerely... HA! And you thought I didn't believe anything) everyone you meet has something to teach you. However, moving forward I think I'm going to try to remember that I don't owe everyone for every lesson. I think maybe in the future I'll move away from polite but insincere complements to people I don't like or respect but feel some need to keep happy. I'll just do what I've really wanted to all long. Politely disregard them. Civility I owe them, but any wisdom they impart to me has long been bought and paid for.
Anyway, that was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too deep, so here have some kittens.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
THANK YOU!!!!
To all of our friends who showed up for Sugar Q's first big performance, THANK YOU. Seriously, you guys let the girls know that all their had work was appreciated, and made the show better for everyone. We owe all of you.
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Monday, April 21, 2008
Ladies and Gentlemen
I give you your entertainment for this weekend, Sugar Q. Two shows each night (7 & 10). Tickets at Tickets West, Vega Dance Lab (who's web site is wonky right now), or at the door. Seriously, hot chicks, sexy outfits, humor, singing, dancing, and John in a bowler.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Friday, April 18, 2008
On religion
Part one of many I'm sure...
"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself." -Peter O'Toole
"When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself." -Peter O'Toole
Shannon explores her roots
While doing research the other night, we discovered that Shannon actually has the blood of a Celtic warrior princess in her veins. She is a direct descendant of the clan "Barfruin". A proud, valiant, stain producing, shirt ruining, wine spewing name.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
I don't know what's funnier....
Watching this or trolling the Heath Ledger fans. Thanks Brandie.
EDIT: Well, I can't troll 13 year old Heath Ledger fans on you tube anymore, but the video is still worth watching.
EDIT: Well, I can't troll 13 year old Heath Ledger fans on you tube anymore, but the video is still worth watching.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Anyone else remember....
The McDLT? As a burger connoisseur, I'll admit there have been far better fast food burgers out there. The Whopper (if you get a fresh one) is still up there among the best, as is Burgerville's stuff. Neither one of which stack up to Humdinger. But I digress. I like my veggies cool and my meat hot (LOL). It was a good idea. ZERE VILL BE ORDER IN MEIN BURGER!!!!!!!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
A few words before sleep....
This place is over rated but rad. I have a new, but lame wardrobe. I need new spark plugs in the Honda. Shannon is the best wife ever. Everyone I know listens to indy rock. It's OK. However, no matter how many people want to consider me white trash (true as the accusation may be) because of my love of decent metal, I'm going to support my assertion that Slayer makes me happy and this is art (check out p-love on chino's play list. Oh, and the track from Tarentel is SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK). Enjoy your Modest Mouse pussies, I'll be over here rocking ass. This is the music real men listen to before we feed you your bedazzled jeans with one hand while slamming a Pabst with the other.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Friday, April 04, 2008
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE
I will buy a ticket right freaking now. Usuuuuuuuuuuuuuul!!!!!
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Shannon...
Wants one of these, because a friend is offering. I think it's a fantastically bad idea. C'mon, remember Lenny? The last thing I want is to go through that again. Your thought? Am I ready to love again? Am I ready to have my prized possessions soaked in cat urine again? Am I ready to have my hands covered in bleeding cat bite wounds again?
Sunday, March 30, 2008
No country for old men
Beautifully (seriously, INCREDIBLY) shot, powerfully acted, script was... decent. But anyway, let's get to the point. As some of you may know, I have a problem with theaters. Well, not so much theaters but crowds. Large groups of people freak me right the f**k out. So, I usually rent movies if I see them at all. I had been dying to see No Country For Old Men and I was not disappointed. It was everything I thought it would be. However, after watching it I turned the DVD cover around and read the review on the back. The last sentence includes this: "right up until it's heart-stopping final moment".
Really?
Spoiler ahead!!!
Tommy Lee Jones and the lady with the beautiful eyes that played his wife having breakfast together and talking about what he will do in his retirement is NOT HEART-STOPPING!!!!! It's not even heart-racing. If anything, my pulse slowed. It could have been billed as a sedative after the rest of the movie. A better adjective? Disappointing. Sleep-inducing. Hyper-realistic.
Meh.
Really?
Spoiler ahead!!!
Tommy Lee Jones and the lady with the beautiful eyes that played his wife having breakfast together and talking about what he will do in his retirement is NOT HEART-STOPPING!!!!! It's not even heart-racing. If anything, my pulse slowed. It could have been billed as a sedative after the rest of the movie. A better adjective? Disappointing. Sleep-inducing. Hyper-realistic.
Meh.
Friday, March 28, 2008
God bless Mexico
Between what I see when I visit and what I read I am loving our southern neighbor a little more every day.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Don't say I never gave you anything.
Here's this thing. It comes with the promise that I will never give you up, let you down, run around, or desert you. You wouldn't get that from any other guy.
Monday, March 24, 2008
The 2008 Presidental Race
Well, it's getting ugly. I think maybe the current state is best summed up with the following image:
While perhaps not the best...
Thursday, March 20, 2008
I could REALLY use a break.
I'm getting a little tired of life kicking me in the balls. On top of a bunch of other not so fun shit... I had the perfect job lined up. Fun people, great technology, great location. I already knew a bunch of people their, and my skills were a letter for letter match to their reqs. I was a lock for the job. They called me yesterday to say they're filling it from within. The second time this has happened to me.
Sigh.... You ever wanna just give up? Seriously, WTF?
Sigh.... You ever wanna just give up? Seriously, WTF?
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
What I've learned tonight
A) My neck is big. Seriously, very few people have a neck as thick as mine. It's more than just a little weird.
B) Were I not married, I would spend the rest of my life trying to find a way to merge with GlaDOS. I don't think I've ever encountered any intelligence, artificial or organic, that seemed more intrinsically hard wired to my own sick conscious. BTW, if you haven't played Portal, you should.
"This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Aperture Science
We do what we must
because we can.
For the good of all of us.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
And the Science gets done.
And you make a neat gun.
For the people who are still alive.
I'm not even angry.
I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
And we're out of beta.
We're releasing on time.
So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Think of all the things we learned
for the people who are still alive.
Go ahead and leave me.
I think I prefer to stay inside.
Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
Maybe Black Mesa
THAT WAS A JOKE.
HAHA. FAT CHANCE.
Anyway, this cake is great.
It's so delicious and moist.
Look at me still talking
when there's Science to do.
When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
I've experiments to run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are still alive.
And believe me I am still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
STILL ALIVE"
B) Were I not married, I would spend the rest of my life trying to find a way to merge with GlaDOS. I don't think I've ever encountered any intelligence, artificial or organic, that seemed more intrinsically hard wired to my own sick conscious. BTW, if you haven't played Portal, you should.
"This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Aperture Science
We do what we must
because we can.
For the good of all of us.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
And the Science gets done.
And you make a neat gun.
For the people who are still alive.
I'm not even angry.
I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me.
And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data make a beautiful line.
And we're out of beta.
We're releasing on time.
So I'm GLaD. I got burned.
Think of all the things we learned
for the people who are still alive.
Go ahead and leave me.
I think I prefer to stay inside.
Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
Maybe Black Mesa
THAT WAS A JOKE.
HAHA. FAT CHANCE.
Anyway, this cake is great.
It's so delicious and moist.
Look at me still talking
when there's Science to do.
When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you.
I've experiments to run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are still alive.
And believe me I am still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
STILL ALIVE"
I bequeath a gift to thee
Enjoyest thee this olde however virtuous and worthy webbed site. Huzzah! Oh, and beware moors and the black death!
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Hey Michael!
I just got home. If you need an ego stroke, I spent an hour or so here talking with some folks about how awesome you are.
The wisdom of Ms. A
Wisdom-->: "A full course malaria treatment costs $0.50. So saving one life can cost two shiny quarters. Since we've already tried to bring about peace for some time now by killing people how bout we try bringing peace by saving people. Maybe just for a few years to see how it works out."
So, for the cost of one months worth of war we could hook up 24 billion people with something that could save their lives? Huh. Seems like a pretty easy choice doesn't it? Remember that the next time you feel compelled to fill up your tank or vote republican (yeah, I know that the democrats are not much better). Would you rather drive to work for 10 dollars or save a human life? Yeah, they're probably worthless like the rest of humanity (I am seriously hoping for a cataclysm around 2012) but they deserve a chance to show how worthless they are. Who knows? One of those kids dying for no other reason than poverty might have the answer. I'd rather bet on that than betting that killing enough brown people will enable me to eat a blooming onion or drive a escalade across the street.
Well said, Senorita.
So, for the cost of one months worth of war we could hook up 24 billion people with something that could save their lives? Huh. Seems like a pretty easy choice doesn't it? Remember that the next time you feel compelled to fill up your tank or vote republican (yeah, I know that the democrats are not much better). Would you rather drive to work for 10 dollars or save a human life? Yeah, they're probably worthless like the rest of humanity (I am seriously hoping for a cataclysm around 2012) but they deserve a chance to show how worthless they are. Who knows? One of those kids dying for no other reason than poverty might have the answer. I'd rather bet on that than betting that killing enough brown people will enable me to eat a blooming onion or drive a escalade across the street.
Well said, Senorita.
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